With Father’s Day coming soon, many of you dads out there may want to buy yourself a present, perhaps something with four wheels and an engine. But many of you, as happens with age, don’t have quite as many hairs on your head as you used to have. What do you do?
Don’t worry, we at TFLcar are here to help. We pored over the data for at least five minutes to give you our list of the top five new cars you can buy to hide your balding pate.
Without further ado, here is the list:
5. 2016 Mercedes-Maybach S600: The big – no, huge – Mercedes sedan has a twin-turbocharged, 6.0-liter V-12 that puts out 523 horsepower and propels the beast to 60 mph in 5 seconds, all while coddling the occupants, especially the back seat passengers, in swaths of luxury. It’s that luxury that is the key to the Maybach’s ability to hide any lack of hair, because if you’re driving this car, you’re most likely wearing a chauffeur’s hat.
4. 2016 Chevrolet Camaro: While the Camaro’s muscular design, available big V-8 engine and complete lack of practicality make it the quintessential midlife crisis car, the key to its baldness-hiding ability lies with those narrow side windows. With the high doorsill, low roof, and slit-like windows, no one will be able to see the top of your head while you’re enjoying all this pony car has to offer.
3. 2015 Subaru WRX: The rally-inspired Subie is a fine sports sedan and is a sensible choice for anyone wanting a sporting car with all-weather traction. But the WRX has been the unofficial car of “dude-bros” since its introduction, so you can’t really drive one without the prerequisite baseball cap, either worn backwards or slightly off-center. It may actually be a law.
2. 2015 Caterham Seven 620R: Caterham’s take on the classic Lotus Super Seven is one of the best examples of pure, raw driving excitement available anywhere. The 620R has the added bonus of not having a windshield, meaning the driver has to wear a crash helmet. As a bonus, wear a white one and tell everyone that you’re The Stig’s not-really-bald cousin.
1. Jaguar F-TYPE Coupe: The F-TYPE is a return to what Jaguar used to do best, a thoroughly modern interpretation of what the E-Type would be if it were in production today. It comes with a choice of supercharged V-6 or V-8 engines, rear or all wheel drive, and a real six-speed manual transmission. Why is it TFLcar’s number one choice for hiding baldness? Simple: The F-TYPE Coupe is so breathtakingly beautiful that no one will care how much hair you have on your head, because no one will even notice you.
Check out this TFLcar 0-60 video review of the dazzling 2015 Jaguar F-TYPE Coupe: